interpol15 | update and JON/SPENCER FIC OUTLINE!

I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD THAT I AM FINALLY BACK IN MADISON AND CONNECTED TO THE NET. NO MORE UNANNOUNCED TRIPS TO WAUKESHA OR ELKHORN THAT END UP GETTING EXTENDED BY A WEEK ANYMORE, I PROMISE!

This weekend/week is going to be spent 1. FINDING A FUCKING JOB, 2. trying to scrape up a way to pay my rent by Sunday. 3. trying to get the the Empires record release party on the 4th, 4. spending as much time and money at Whole Foods as I can, and 5. WORKING ON THE 5 WIPS/FIC BUNNIES THAT I HAVE RUNNING AROUND IN MY HEAD.

Seriously, once I try to start working on the psychic-soldier!Bob fic, my American Gods Jon Walker decides to not leave me alone at all (I'm thinking of going with Dionysus for Jon. A god of music, drink and reaching/finding the divinity in oneself through ecstacy [drink, drug, music], Dionysus is a singularily unique god among the Greek pantheon because he offered the hope to humanity that they too had a spark of the divine in them and had the ability to pierce the veil of Maya and go beyond what can just be seen and measured, and as god of the vine, had a Jesus-like story of death and rebirth, providing hope for eternity to man).

And now I have a ER-surgeon!Jon and starting-his-rounds new nurse!Spencer, with grad students Ryan and Brenden, where Spence is the new nurse at Las Vegas Mercy, and his first rotation is in the ER, where he meets Jon, and all the nurses have a pool on when they're going to hook up, but Jon thinks Spencer is with Ryan, since they're always together, and Spence and Ryan share a car, but then Ryan brings Brendon in (after he comes out to his parents, and word gets around his former church, and some of his old friends decide to prove a point), and while Brendon only has some minor bruises and cuts, Ryan and Spence make him move in with them (cause Brendon was living with his parents to save money on grad school, but that's now over), and then Jon gets to hear about the Epic Love Story of Ryan and Brendon, and so he ups his flirting and being awesome, and Spencer seems to play it hot and cool, which confuses Jon, since he knows he's interested, but for some reason is hesitant to do anything about it.

And then Spencer's rotation is coming up, and it's late and night, and everyone in the ER is exhausted after a drunk driving crash that ended up with several fatalities, and Spence and Jon are outside after their shift, smoking, when Spence turns to Jon and asks "how can you deal with it? I mean, the girl, she was only seven.." and his voice just breaks, and Jon puts his arms around Spencer and somehow ends up kissing him, which turns into something heated. They race to Jon's car, barely making to to his apartment before Jon has Spencer up against the wall, holding his hands above his head, grinding and biting Spence's neck, elicting soft wimpers from Spence. And before they know it, Jon's fucking Spencer against the wall, and holy shit, Spence had no idea Jon was that strong. he's so short. And they spend the entire weekend like that, simply just taking comfort with someone else who truly understands what it's like.

And back at work, even though Spencer is now in the neo-natal/infant unit, Jon won't let him go, and pretty soon they're practically living together, but Ryan knows how Spencer overthinks and will sabotage his relationships by assuming the worst and not talking, when Spence finds the letter from John Hopkins, inviting Jon to take part in a residency. And he knows how great this would be for Jon's career, but knows that Jon won't leave Vegas is he feels like it would hurt Spencer, so Spence just breaks it off. And Jon's hurt and bewildered, cause he just came home one day find all of Spence's stuff gone, and he's not returning his calls, and is avoiding him at work, and Jon's begging Ryan and Brendon to tell him what he did wrong, because when he cornered Spence at work and said "I thought I was always going to have you, Spencer Smith", and Spence just says they were fucking around, nothing serious (turning and missing the look of utter heartbreak on Jon's face), while Spencer just sits in his room, staring at his phone, why Ryan just glares at him, and says "you love him".

It's not a question, but Spencer nods anyway, and Ryan just asks "what makes you think that he doesn't feel the same way?", and Spence just shrugs. "He's not Brent, Spence. Not every person that you care about is going to leave you for the next best thing. Not all relationships are one-sided." And Spence tells him about the letter, and Ryan just rolls his eyes and gives him a hug that means "you fucking idiot". But it's been three weeks, and Spencer has this huge hole in his chest that reaches down into the pit in his stomach, but Jon's been out of town (rumor is out east, and Spence just knows he's working out the details with John Hopkins), and he thinks that things would be getting better, but its not at all working.

And it's now Tom and Greta's wedding, and Spencer isn't going to go (since Jon and Tom are best friends), but Greta is his good friend, and he and Bren and Ryan all go together, and just after dinner, there's an announcement of a special performance, and out comes Jon with his guitar and he starts singing:

I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

On my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand

And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go

And Spencer's just barely holding back tears, and Jon's on his knees and isn't even trying to stop crying, and he puts down his guitar, and Spencer just can't stop saying he's sorry but Jon whispers "it's okay, Spence, I understand" (cause Ryan's a total snitch, the bastard), and Jon says "will you have me, Spencer Smith?" Spencer can just feel a smile starting. "Is that a proposal?", he tries to joke, but Jon just clutches Spencer's hands and says "yes", dead serious, and now Spencer is crying, but the good kind, and they kiss amidst the smiles and cheers of the wedding party.