(no subject)

hi. my mom has already started talking to me about my birthday, which got me thinking. so i'm putting up a list of the stuff that i want come november.

1. quality bottle of Finlandia
2. cheap bottle of Smirnoff
3. bottle of something else (Jack, rum, etc.)
4. A RIDE to and back from milwaukee for the 10.23.05 HIM concert. If i get a ride I'LL BUY the damn tickets tomorrow and treat the driver to a concert.
5. my sister to get off my case because of some of the stuff i've written here. she thinks i'm just putting up a facade and am not really well. just because i'm on meds doesn't mean that i don't have emotions.
6. Nightmare before christmas DVD
7. a boyfriend (or girlfriend, but i'd prefer a boy)
8. someone who will come with me when i get my tattoo's
9. Ville/Bam, Davey/Jade, (hell, any of the pairings that i like) TOGETHER AND ON VIDEO.

that's all i have for now folks. sorry if this is a little early, but i just got to thinking.

(no subject)

My sister found my lj. And now she says that she's worried that i'm all depressed and stuff. She wants me to talk to my parents or else she will, and i know that she will stretch the truth and make it seem like i'm having a breakdown or worse.
I don't know how to tell her that what i write here doesn't mean that i'm all suicidal. Yeah, i had problems ONCE, but i really am ok now. Of course i have days where i'm not all happy cheery, but i'm not skipping my meds, i've adjusted to school, and my biggest problem right now is when will i get the time to go to the bank to ask about my online checking and apply for a credit card.
I know some of the stuff here seems far out and kinda freaky, but it's just me figuring out who the hell i am, and what i really want. I have a right to explore new things. and just because she had problems when she was a freshman doesn't mean that i will too. and i know what to do in those kind of situations, and am not afraid to tell people that i need help. hell, half of this journal is just me analyzing parts of myself and figuring out what happened during all of high school.

I guess that's the good thing about college is that i can try to ignore everyone until thanksgiving, and then SHOW them that i'm (pretty much) ok.

I just realized that i'm pratically living that my chemical romance song I'm not ok (I promise) .

Alright then, I promise that i'm ok, i promise that i'm (not) ok.

(no subject)

AHHHH! Happy Birthday Bam! (does her happy dance)

And yes i watch THAT show, and yes, i do like Bam (more then i should).

LOST

i am a hopeless lost addict. i mean, it is bad. and i just saw the last episode. WTF!!!!

it's not that i want to know what's going on, it's that i NEED to know.

who are the others? why can locke now walk? what's with the french lady? and the girl in the back seat that's now showing up? 4 8 15 16 23 42? i have no clue. why boone? what is with desmond? who took walt and WHY? why don't we have more charlie? why is there a polar bear on the island? what are the noises? WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?

this show is seriously effed up. but just as addictive as x-files. i am so screwed.